We are conditioned to feel a certain way about the word ‘emotional’.
Being called ‘emotional’ use to mean to me showing sadness or extreme stress. But.
Emotions are so much more than that.
Emotions are communication. They have so much they can tell us about how our current experience is being impacted by our past. They have so much to tell us about how we want to move forward.
In saying that, I don’t think we always need to process or over intellectualize how we are feeling. When I am doing the 90 Emotional Days challenge (starts when baby girl is earthside Monday), I will also be practicing witnessing myself in any particular emotion. I will be practicing showing myself compassion and non judgement in regulating my nervous system.
@the.holistic.psychologist on Instagram recently wrote an incredible post on how unresolved trauma creates nervous system dysregulation in our bodies and how we can become a non judgmental witness to what is happening. Inspired by this and building on practices I already have, this is the approach I am going to take when I notice dysregulation.
As I breathe, say these 3 things to myself (or write them)
· I am an adult with agency, I have choice in how I respond
· This is a trauma response and I am going to get through this. This is not me. I’ve got this!
· I love and accept myself right now
Release the trauma energy from my body
· Cry (I will not tell myself it is weak to cry)
· Do deep belly breaths (on the exhale imagine stress leaving your body)
· Go for a fast paced walk. This could just be around the house with the baby on the boob or in backyard. I don’t necessarily have to remove myself from my family if it is not possible to do in that moment
· Shake my arms in circular motions, noticing the heat. Or dance with my babies.
Engage in self soothing
· Sit in a space alone (if possible) and tell myself ‘I am safe now’
· Hold my hands on my heart and say ‘I accept this’
· Journal what I’m feeling (just let the pen flow)
· Listen to music or affirmations that bring me peace or joy
What would you add to this list?